I always recommend and strongly suggest being accountable. In fact, I recommend it frequently.
You might wonder why: accountability is a powerful tool you should always have in your repertoire.
Interested? In today’s article I invite you to ponder why you should commit to accountability—and how holding others accountable is a pleasurable win:
1. Accountable Displays Integrity
In this post, I shared why integrity is important in life and relationships. I described how having integrity gifts you an easier life experience—especially after a challenging loss, like a breakup.
Accountability is an attractive trait: it’s in high demand, but rarely seen, especially in dating or relationships.
We desire accountability in others because it helps us develop a sense of being secure.
2. Being Accountable Streamlines Transparency
Have you known someone who has different masks to everyone in their life? So much they give Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde a run for their money?
When we commit to being accountable, we streamline our ability to be transparent. We invite ourselves to show up fully and be seen.
And that’s courage. When you are able to truly be you, in all circumstances—on any day, in any place. Someone can catch you totally “off guard”; shock & surprise you; and yet the beauty is, you’d still be you.
3. Accountability Allows You The Permission To Be Beautifully YOU
When you practice being accountable, your full-time commitment is always to YOU. Your inner relationship with yourself will always be reflected in your immediate world and the experience of it.
There are many versions of “reality” happening right now: the one inside your head; the one outside and independent of your thoughts; the one shared collectively with those around you; and the one happening to someone across and on the other side of the world/universe.
Despite all these variations, being accountable to who you are allows you to embrace the wonderfully complex parts of you—your best self…and your most challenged self.
4. Accountability Invites You To Grow
Because when we are accountable to our authenticity, we invite ourselves to love our journey in its entirety. When we can accept and embrace both polarities—realizing as humans all we are are untapped possibilities and potentials—we begin to feel empowered through our choices.
And we accept the power of choice, we honor how we can immediately and completely change our life through a single decision.
We can also learn from our mistakes because they become opportunities for a learned lesson.
5. Accountable Embraces Your Flaws
Being accountable disarms your flaws being used as weapons to feed your insecurity. Instead, you embrace thoughts of insecurity as such—thoughts.
The empowering thing is: you DON’T have to put energy or action behind those thoughts.
You can simply allow them to be experiences given to you by your own mind. Your mind is working in its balanced complexity. It’s serving its function: throwing as many thoughts—some good, some bad, some contradictory—and allowing yourself to experience the depths of being fully human.
6. Hold Others Accountable To Their Actions
You want to know the quickest way to upset and make someone uncomfortable? Hold them accountable.
The fact is most people do not want to be held accountable for their actions. They like to disassociate their ideas of who they are from their actuality—their actions.
But all we ever are in life is our choices and actions.
Have you ever seen cockroaches scurry when light is shown directly at them? This is the same effect accountability has on those who are shifty; manipulative; deceptive; cheaters; abusers; etc. It operates the same way.
You be the beam of light. Let others be…well, you know.
7. Accountability Helps You Discover Where You Are
When you hold others accountable to their actions and their words, you get a clear understanding of where you are in their lives. Someone they respect? Someone they disrespect?
Including in arguments. As heated an argument might get, by calmly holding yourself accountable to the words you express—and how you express it—you have proven to yourself you are not the “insane crazy one”.
You certainly will make another feel insane and crazy if you hold them accountable to especially their less than stellar choices and actions. Let them be “the crazy one”. You be “the one that got away”.
8. Being Accountable Allows You The Gift Of Being “The One That Got Away”
When you are able to own up to your strengths and flaws, you’re embracing the totality of your humanity. You don’t find yourself getting too frazzled by someone pointing out your faults or flaws. It doesn’t become a personal attack—but an opportunity to grow, try something new, and be better—because you are a constant student of life.
Especially of YOUR life.
It’s this type of vibe and attitude that allows you the position of “The One That Got Away”. By being the person who has the capacity to grow and change, people will always be curious about how you are growing and changing.
9. Being Accountable Always Gives You Closure
I wrote here how guilt and lack of integrity always make breakups harder for the guilty party. Don’t be that party. By holding yourself accountable you are able to walk away with peace in your heart.
Because you ALWAYS meet YOU when the severance of a relationship occurs. You will always meet your self after any breakup.
If you’ve held yourself accountable to the standard of integrity, and keeping your hands clean, you are investing in a future where you’ve already given yourself closure.
10. The 2 Biggest Fears
Two things frighten most people: realizing they aren’t as stellar as they claim to be; or realizing they are beyond stellar than what their mind limits them to believe.
The problem lies in the fact just as much as these fears are true, so is the rampant lies a person is willing to tell themselves. People are always willing to commit to realities that make them comfortable.
And when dealing with a narcissist; an emotionally unintelligent person; sociopath; emotionally unavailable; a bully; a “gaslighter”; or a plain mean person—your ability to remain accountable to your standards, your worth, & value will allow you to accept your new reality:
You are beyond stellar than what your mind limits you to believe.
Conclusion
Your choices and decisions fully reflect who you are. And reveals where you are emotionally, mentally, and/or spiritually.
It’s important to own up fully to every choice you make. Even if later, you are embarrassed or ashamed—this prevents the blockage of guilt to develop in your life.
It isn’t easy and requires work. However, just like with all things which do, it frees you to make courageous choices when confronted with someone who lacks the things you do: courage; integrity; and accountability.
When you combine all of these forces, you trust in yourself. You have your own back. And even when a circumstance tests your will and fortitude, you can arise fully, wiser, and completely loving yourself.
And that is something no one can ever take from you. “No one can make you inferior without your consent.” -Eleanor Roosevelt
Be Well & Vibe Well,
– Liana
